Relationship, Couples & Marriage Counselling Perth

I have a passion to help people live happier lives through more loving, joyful and fulfilling relationships.
I do this by educating, up-skilling and supporting people who want happier lives by improving their relationships.

Let me also ask, have you thought about what underlies all problems, issues, or challenges in any relationship? No matter what the relationship, whether it is between Spouses, Parents and Children, Management and Staff, even Countries. The root of all relationship problems is simply, one or both parties’ needs are not being met.

While this simple concept is easy to understand, it is a different matter to now work at getting the needs met on both sides. Caught up in relationship issues are emotions and a history of patterns of behaviour that have typically caused pain on some level to at least one party

The focus of Your Relationship Specialist is to treat every situation as unique. No matter what the circumstances are, to honour and respect each party, and acknowledge as a starting point that the best solution will come when looking to get everyone’s needs met. Unfortunately there are times when one party will not come to the table and ties may need to be severed. However it has been the experience that when both parties are able to express and understand the needs of the other, the best outcome for all is found.

Aside from the many proven tools, techniques and approaches available to help you, three key roles are often used in sessions:

Counselling Role:

People often need their experiences, feelings, and authentic story to be heard and totally accepted without any judgement, criticism or evaluation. What happened or is happening to them is 100% real in their world and the impact it is having on their life. In the Relationship Counselling or Marriage Counselling role, you can safely share what is going on for you..

Coaching Role:

When coaching, many questions will be asked to help the person search for their own answers and insights. Often you will have the answers and may know what to do but there is something in the way that is either blocking or sabotaging your actions. So with Relationship Coaching or Marriage Coaching, the focus is on helping you get clear on what you want and to identify the resources you already have inside.

Consultant Role:

There are two key reasons that people are often not able to resolve relationship issues.
1. Limited Options: You many have limited options to choose from when facing a relationship or marriage issue. Like only having a menu of three choices at a restaurant. So when you are faced with a relationship problem you will choose the best option available to you. Often these are the limited options you have used in the past. The same is true for the other person, they have a set of limited options that they are probably familiar with and continually use.
2. Lack Of Independent Support: You may not have independent support to help develop new strategies and help keep you on track as you start to try out new ways. It takes time to develop new habits and ways of thinking. You may have experienced giving up and reverting back to an old familiar pattern or strategy.

As a Consultant, this role is to offer new customised strategies to help you with your relationship. This will give you more choices and awareness in handling relationship situations. These strategies will always be working toward getting your needs met as well as helping others get their needs met.

When one person in a relationship changes, the dynamics in the relationship must change. So if you are looking to change your marriage or relationship, by you changing things around you will change also. The big challenge here is that your marriage or relationship will unconsciously want things to remain the same as this is what people around you are familiar with. This is where working with someone is critical to support you as you create and develop your new habits to become the more authentic you. The best thing you can do is start today with support.

For one, a session is a session. There is no fixed time for a session, as everyone is different, and it depends what comes up on the day. Most other counsellors and psychologists have sessions around about 60 minutes and some may have slightly longer sessions at 90 minutes to 2 hours. There will be a natural flow for your session. 

With the initial session we allow a good 5 to 6 hours.  This gives time to really identify the patterns going on in the relationship and go though the knowledge and strategies that will for your tool kit to take away and work with.

Follow up sessions are a good 2 to 3 hours where we consolidate to ensure that you are using what you have in your tool kit well, refine and provide additional knowledge and strategies to improve communication and other areas of your relationship.

Please treat this work as a 12 month project. As with other areas in your life what you look back, it takes time to master new things. Like learning to drive a car, play an instrument or gain the knowledge and skills to be effective in your job or career. The follow up sessions are important to keep on track and provide accountability to ensure that the work is done and the new constructive habits are formed.

Secondly, I have experienced significant pain and loss in life around relationships, and have dedicated my self to finding the very best proven approaches to understanding how relationships really work so I can not only help myself in my relationships but to help others like yourself, in your relationships.