Free Marriage & Relationship Counselling Resources
Relationship Strategies – E&P Attraction with George Kappas
Do you know why you and your partner may be opposites in many areas?
Are you aware that it is natural for couples in a marriage or relationship to be complementary opposites and not really understand the other?
This is a link to a video that goes into what I refer to as the “Head and Heart” model.
In the video George Kappas talks about “Emotionals” and “Physicals”.
“Physicals” = Heart centred people.
“Emotionals” = Head centred people.
After watching the video, there is a test you can do to determine the percentage of Physical (Heart) and Emotional (Head) you are.
Click on the video image to access the video and test.
Theory Of Mind with John Melton
Do you know how your mind works? And why you have some of the challenges you have in life and relationships?
This is a link to a video that goes into what is referred to as “Theory of Mind”. This 33 minute video describes in easy to understand language and examples how our mind works. We see how patterns are set up in childhood and why our unconscious mind runs most of our life.
Can you see the trick now is to create new and better choices, new habits at the unconscious level to serve you better in your relationships?
Click on the video image to access the video.
The 5 Love Languages Test by Dr Gary Chapman.
Do you know you and your partners Love Languages?
If you have children do you know theirs?
This resource is a link to The 5 Love Languages Test where you can find out what your Love Languages are or the Love Languages of your Children.
This will help couples understand why at times they can feel unloved and at other times really loved in their marriage or relationship.
Click on the icon to do the test.
idearly by Narelle Wynter.
This is a fun little app for iphone/ipad (for now), that sends you suggestions to express your love through thoughtful gestures, or random acts of thoughtfulness. This helps adding a variety to your marriage or relationship.
Click on the icon to download the app.
Sattler Files – Relationship Files
To download click on “Download”.
If your browser plays the file, Right mouse click on “Download” and select “Save Link As…”
1 Relationship Challenges – 08/03/2016
2 Why Men Don’t Talk About Relationship Problems – 15/03/2016
3 Using a Talking Stick to Communicate – 22/03/2016
4 Why Vision and Values are Important – 29/03/2016
5 The Challenges With Change – 05/04/2016
6 Expectations and Change – 12/04/2016
7 Relationships are like Dancing – 19/04/2016
8 Deciding to Change – 26/04/2016
Relationship Overview Videos
This is a series of 4 short videos (all less than 5 minutes), that are designed to help you understand relationships better.
While the series uses the relationship between a couple as the focus, the principles and models equally apply between siblings, parents and children, friends and family. These principles also apply in the workplace and in business.
Part 1 – Relationship Overview
This video gives you an overview of the 4 main areas that people have the most challenges with in relationships.
Part 2 – Relationship Foundations
This video gives you an overview of the foundations that make for a Great Relationship.
As with a building, if the foundation is not strong then what is built upon the foundations will be shaky.
Part 3 – Relationship Stages
This video gives you an overview of the ideal 7 stages that people go through to enter and grow their relationship.
Often some of the earlier stages are missed which can cause problems in a relationship.
Part 4 – Relationship Phases
This video gives you an overview of the 3 main phases people go through when they are in a relationship.
While the phases are simple when you see them, often people do not take time to actually acknowledge where they are at, and take action to improve their relationship.
Recommended Books for Marriage and Relationships
Calling In The One by Katherine Woodward Thomas
is a great book to set you up for having the relationship you are desiring. You can use this book to work on your self to clear past relationship baggage and to get clear on the relationship you are longing for.
Even if you are in a marriage or relationship I still recommend this resource to people so that they have an opportunity to do some house cleaning so to speak.
5 Love Languages by Dr Gary Chapman
is a great starting place to answer the questions:
“How do you know I love you?”
“How do I know I am loved?”
Loving and feeling loved is one of our most important needs. I highly recommend that parents know and demonstrate their childrens love languages. This will help them feel loved and secure.
Relationship Strategies by John G. Kappas, Ph.D
gives all the details describing what I refer to as the Head and the Heart model.
In the book, the Heart person is referred to as the Physical or Phys and the Head person is referred to as the Emotional or Emo.
This resource gives you far more detail than the video (above) to help you understand yourself and your partner in your relationship or marriage.
Nonviolent Communication by Marshall B Rosenberg
gives the detail for his body of work referred commonly as NVC.
This is the model I use when coaching and counselling individuals or couples in their relationship. Authentic communication using this structure cuts through a lot of the crap that occurs in common communication between people..
Don’t Be Nice Be Real by Kelly Bryson
is another great book that helps understand and use Nonviolent Communication (NVC).
The Prophet by Kahil Gibran
is a classic resource for you to contemplate each chapter. It has a wonderful philosophy and way for you to look at life. On a personal note this book was my best companion when my marriage fell apart. There are great chapters on Love, Marriage, and Children for starters.
Conscious Uncoupling by Katherine Woodward Thomas
is a great book and process for helping with cleaning up feelings and resentments when a marriage or relationship is over.
Conscious Uncoupling is:
- A 5-Step process for how to end a romantic union in honorable, gracious and respectful ways;
- A step-by-step road map for how to breakup in a way that does minimal damage to all involved;
- A clear guide for how separating couples can create new, cooperative and life-affirming agreements and structures that set everyone up to win moving forward.
Click on the book image to see where you can order it from.
You can also get a free pdf download and audios by going to the home page of the site.
First Steps by Christine Western
is a great resource when your relationship or marriage of is either over or close to being over. It gives practical grounded resources detailing all the considerations and options when you are looking to end a relationship.
When people have read the book and visited Christine’s website, some people take a good look at their relationships and start doing some work on it. Feel free to contact me……. to be sure to be sure your relationship is really over.
For others it is too late and this books helps with the separation process. Ideally people can keep it as much out of the courts as possible and work collaboratively for the best of everybody.
Recommended Books for Children and Parenting
The Little Soul and the Sun by Neale Donald Walsh
The Little Soul and the Sun is a simple and powerful story that brings children a very profound truth: there is not absolute good or bad–that underneath all that happens in the world, all that we call “good” and all that we call “bad,” is love. Your child will discover a God that she or he can love, because God is love, as are all the Little Souls who are a part of God. And perhaps parents, too, will rediscover who they really are.
The Indigo Children by Lee Carroll & Jan Tobler
This book is a must for the parents of unusually bright and active children. Indigo children are those who display a new and unusual set of psychological attributes and show a pattern of behaviour generally undocumented before.
In this groundbreaking book on the Indigo Child, international authors Lee Carroll and Jan Tober report the information of this increasingly documented and world-wide phenomenon and tell you how to identify this behavioural pattern and guide you on how you, as a parent or teacher of these children, can help them realise their amazing potential not forgetting their spiritual needs or specific health issues.
The book has great strategies to assist in parenting children.